Romance Rekindled (Happily Bedded Bliss) Read online

  “Me too, and I’m with them every day.”

  I meant it to comfort him, but by his shrug I could see it had the opposite effect. “If you’re not interested anymore, I understand. You might change your mind once you see how different it will be here.”

  I wanted to tell him I’d have any baby he was willing to give me. I wanted to fix things so he knew Kyle loved him. I wanted to be as sure as he was that we’d be okay here. Not just okay, better than we were at home.

  I wanted to, but I couldn’t. I didn’t know who I’d be outside of New York, outside of my world. Who would I turn to when he failed me if we were here? Would I forget myself and fall for the temptation of being wanted by men like Ted or Seth? I didn’t want to be that woman, but Scott had riddled our marriage with little disappointments, tiny fissures that would have cracked by now if not for the foundation of our family and friends. Without them to go to when he wasn’t around, how would I cope?

  My heels clicked on the marble tiles of the lobby as we made our way past the bar to the bank of elevators. Another drink might quiet the thoughts sprinting through my mind, but we both had full days planned tomorrow. With each step I knew there was far more at stake from this trip than selecting a school for the kids or searching out housing prospects. I had a choice to make. I either had to say goodbye to my family, friends, career – my entire personal safety net – or I had to let my husband make the jump to the west coast alone.

  It wasn’t even about the kids. He’d said as much outside. Because he worked so much he saw them little enough that their world would only be slightly shaken if he went it alone; it was mine that would be rocked completely.

  The elevator doors slid open on cue, no doubt thanks to one of the clerks at the front desk. We stepped inside and Scott punched the button for our floor. The mirrored doors slid closed, giving me an up close and personal view of my marriage.

  “We’re not okay, are we?” I asked the mirror.

  “We’ve been better.” Scott cleared his throat. “It’s been a rough couple of years, but we’ll get it back.”

  Anger surged in me, and I wanted to rail at him. What did he know about the last few years of my life? He’d been everywhere but home, leaving me alone with two little kids.

  I’d created an entire career in the void of his presence, leaning on my parents to care for the children while I did the legwork. It had started as an excuse to get out of the house and speak to adults, but grew into something lucrative that I loved. It wasn’t exactly what I wanted to be doing, but it was what I could do around the kids.

  My heard pounded, my body tensing in preparation for battle. Scott’s thumb traced a circle on the back of my hand, over and over. My gaze fluttered down to our joined hands, so entangled it was as if they’d fused together. What was I fighting against, exactly?

  He’d never accused me of being the one letting the relationship go. He was travelling so much, and I grew tired of making every homecoming an event. I didn’t expect him to do a thing when he was home; I was used to doing it all myself.

  We both just let other things take priority until us became an afterthought. So much so that my husband now thought he had nothing to lose by moving across the country, with or without me.

  The rage that had filled me seconds ago snuffed out, leaving a horrid, empty feeling. Never had reality smacked into me with such vengeance. The elevator chimed, the doors opening to the plush carpeted hallway. We walked to the room together, as if everything hadn’t changed. But then he’d been aware of things for a lot longer than I had.

  He held the door of the room open for me and I stepped inside, taking a deep breath. While we were gone the room had been tidied up, a vase of red roses on the dresser and rose petals scattered over the bed. He must have arranged for it before we’d left.

  I knew what I wanted. The sheer panic coursing through me was confirmation of what I already knew. I wanted to be where he was, I had since I’d laid eyes on him that summer after high school. Moving across the country, away from everyone I’d ever known with only Scott to cling to was terrifying.

  He’d checked out of our relationship, giving all his attention to work and only coming home for a day of meetings and a change of clothes. And I’d let him. I never called him on it. The first tantrum I’d thrown had come when he sold the apartment. When did I stop paying attention?

  I crossed the room, coming to the floor to ceiling windows looking out over downtown Portland and the Willamette River beyond. Behind me Scott turned on a lamp, a warm light suffusing the room. I closed my eyes and tried to find the words to explain how I was feeling, but if there were any they escaped me.

  “The flowers are nice.” I wasn’t sure what to say, where to begin.

  “Portland is the rose city. I thought it might help convince you. There’s a rose garden that people come from all over the world to see.” Scott slid his jacket from my shoulders, the cloth rustling as he tossed it onto the armchair in the corner. He stepped closer, the heat of his body warming me. His arms wrapped around me, his chin coming to rest atop my head. It was a position we’d been in so many times, and yet this was the first time it didn’t reassure me.

  “Did I do something? Should I have done something different?”

  “Oh Jess, it’s not like that.” He kissed the top of my head, then released his hold to rub my arms. “We’re good, we just took it for granted for too long, I think. I wasn’t there for you, and then you didn’t need me, and nothing was wrong so there was nothing to fix. I didn’t see a way out of it until the buyout happened. I panicked because if I didn’t have a job you wouldn’t need me at all.”

  “That’s not –”

  He held my arms tightly, keeping me from turning around. “It’s how I felt, why I scrambled to make sure I had a position with the new company. It’s a fresh start, Jess. Give it a year. If you hate it here, we’ll move back. But we need the time to get us back on track.”

  I wanted to argue that we could do that at home, but as I thought about it I realized he was right. We needed to learn how to depend on one another again, without the crutch that friends and family had provided. If we stayed, our relationship might limp along forever; but if we came here and focused on fixing things, we’d be able to walk on our own.

  His hands curved over my shoulders, his lips following the path. Desire pulsed to life anew, replacing the darker emotions rolling through me. As he unzipped the back of my dress, deep in my belly a slow, molten feeling emerged.

  The heat of his hands on me, the feel of his body behind me, and the length of his cock pressing insistently against my backside made me moan with want. I tilted my head back and turned it to kiss him. It began soft and gentle, but like a match on dry tinder, quickly grew urgent with the need to connect in the most primal way.

  A riot of sensation rushed through my body, wrapping me up in the smells and flavors I knew so well, but there was an underlying rush of something new and thrilling. He spread open the back of my dress, his hands hot on my body as he pushed it off my shoulders and down to the ground.

  I tensed and broke the kiss. “With the lights on, someone could see in.”

  “You think anyone is watching?” His hands stroked up the smooth skin of my belly, cupping my breasts over my black lace bra.

  Chapter 7

  A drenaline coursed through me, making me wonder where it came from. After our interlude on the plane, I’d had more than enough of being an exhibitionist. Or so I’d thought.

  “Do you want someone to see us?” I stepped out of my dress, kicking it towards the chair.

  “It’s much safer than the Watt’s parties.”

  My heart stalled at his words. Was he considering that we go? Is that what he meant by a fresh start?

  “We’re twenty floors up,” he whispered huskily as his fingers worked my flesh. “Someone would really have to be looking. They’d never recognize us, we’d never have to look them in the eye.”

  The tension drain
ed from me. He didn’t want to deal with the repercussions either. But a little imagination couldn’t hurt. I looked out over the town, finding one of the few buildings tall enough to be able to see into our room. I imagined a telescope just inside one of the dark windows and my pussy clenched in anticipation.

  He squeezed my breasts, the lace of the bra scratching at my nipples. I tilted my head to the side, giving him access to my neck. He took the hint, his warm mouth teasing the sensitive skin. I closed my eyes, letting myself get caught up in the riot of sensation, watching in my mind as he pressed my tits together, then undid the front clasp of my bra and peeled it away. I shrugged it off, wondering if anyone could see.

  My freckles would fade with the distance, but the hard pink tips of my nipples would be on full display. Scott’s large hands holding them up, my flesh so pale next to his tanned fingers. A scrap of lace for panties and my black spike heeled boots were all that separated me from total exposure.

  I lifted my arms and wrapped them around him, tangling my hands in his hair. He pinched one nipple, harder than I expected, his teeth scraping against my neck at the same instant. I had to wiggle my hips to dissipate the growing heaviness. My God, we were a sight, the picture in my mind turning me on more than any porn I’d ever seen.

  How could I live without this? Without this driving urgency, the heat of his hands on me, the bone deep promise of trust and acceptance that gave me permission to act on instinct rather than worry about propriety? I didn’t think I could.

  I was burning up, yet the coolness of the window seeped toward me. Scott’s hands slid down my body, one hand settling on my hip. The other snaked over my lace bikini panties, between my legs. He pushed back on my pubic bone, pressing my ass against his hard cock.

  “Yes,” I hissed, spinning around to face him. This is what I needed, to feel connected, tethered to him so I wouldn’t do something stupid like let my pride fool me into letting him get away.

  He pressed me back against the glass, taking my hands in his and holding them out to the sides, pressing my arms against the cold glass. I shivered, and then a picture of how we’d look from the outside made me shiver again.

  His head dipped, his tongue tracing a line down my neck, teasing me until he fastened his lips on a nipple. He pulled it deep into his mouth, swirling his tongue. I twisted sinuously, trying for closer contact, but his hands on mine kept me a prisoner of the glass. A deep pull of his mouth and he released me, turning his attentions on the other peak. Tension built deep inside, torturing me so that when he finally let go of my hands it took me a moment to reach for him, threading my hands in his hair as he trailed his tongue lower still.

  My belly quivered as he licked his way down, dropping to his knees in front of me. Another flash of how we must look through glass hit me with a bolt of desire. He paused just long enough to get rid of his shirt, which really improved the effect. Watching the muscles of his shoulders and back bunch and relax as he moved sent a thrill through me I’d never tire of.

  I ran my fingers over the smooth skin of his shoulders, the heat and hardness of his muscles intoxicating beneath my fingertips. Simply having my hands on his body as he moved heightened my reaction to his touch. He reached for my hips, hooking his fingers in my panties and tugging them down.

  In full sight of anyone who might me looking, I stood bare in front of the window. Scott pressed a soft kiss on my hip, his lips making a slow journey along the sensitive skin where my leg and torso met. His hands slid between my legs, gently guiding them apart as I stepped wider.

  I gasped as the wet warmth of his tongue slid into my pussy. To brace myself I placed a hand flat against the cold window, the differing temperatures causing a mutiny of sensation within me. His tongue stroked my clit as his stubble scraped at my inner thighs. I tilted my hips, my upper back pressing against the window while his tongue swirled and fluttered, each wet, slick slide making my hips move of their own volition.

  I couldn’t control my response anymore than I could control the breathy moans filling the room. He kept at me, driving me higher, teasing me by tracing a finger where I was wettest. He dipped into me, his tongue in my slit, his finger in my cunt, and I came undone. An orgasm ripped through me in a rush of pleasure, the sensations pulsing from my core all the way to my toes. He didn’t stop, his mouth still working while I wondered how I could keep the pleasure going when it felt like I wasn’t going to be able to stand another second. My hands slid along the window as I looked for traction, finally reaching for him. With one hand in his hair and another on his shoulder I pressed him closer. Another peak crashed into me.

  I cried out as I came, my legs refusing to hold me up any longer. Scott held on to me, somehow managing to guide me back to the bed while I was still coming.

  I stretched back on the rose petals, glorying in the aftershocks. Scott stripped off his pants and underwear, his cock standing long, thick and ready. I licked my lips, wondering if I had enough energy to return the favor he’d done for me. Selfishly, I wanted to fuck, wanted to hold him deep in my body, to keep feeling how much he wanted to please me.

  He took one of my legs in his hand, raising it to his shoulder. The high-heeled boots that had seemed so practical when I’d put them on for dinner now looked terribly erotic. He ran his fingers over my calf, rubbing that spot behind my knee I swear is a direct line to my pussy.

  “I thought I’d have you suck me off in front of the window to finish the show.” His voice was rougher, deeper than usual. The image he painted flashed in my mind. This night would be fueling my fantasies for months to come. “But I can’t think of anything else but this.” His hand left my knee, his fingers spreading the lips of my pussy.

  I gasped as his fingers played with me. Not just from the feel of him but from the intent way he watched what he was doing. His thumb pressed against my clit and I nearly came again, would have if he’d stayed with me a moment longer. He moved his hands to my hips, pulling me to the edge of the bed. He took his cock in his hand, sliding it back and forth along my wet slit, rubbing the head against my clit as I squirmed.

  My pussy was so primed it didn’t take much and I was coming again. Just as my climax started, he thrust inside of me, burying himself deep. It stole the air from my lungs. I reached out, grabbing fistfuls of the comforter in an effort to anchor myself.

  He fucked me hard, the entire length of his cock pounding into my pussy and then retreating. Emptiness to complete fullness, over and over. I tried to work with him, but the force of his thrusts pushed me deeper into the bed until I could only take. He let my leg drop and grabbed my hips, angling me so he could drive into me faster and faster.

  I was so slick and ready from his mouth, it wasn’t long before another orgasm was cresting. The faster he fucked, more of his cock stayed inside of me, stroking me faster and deeper. It felt so good to swallow him up, knowing he’d be buried as deep within me as our bodies would allow when he came. He leaned forward, his hands on either side of my head as he drove deeper. I watched his eyes close, his eyelids start to flutter in the way they did just before he let himself go.

  My own orgasm started, radiating out from so deep that I lost track of where I ended and he began. The pulses of pleasure were bigger than my body, as if my flesh couldn’t possibly contain how good this felt. I heard him cry out, but it seemed to be both far away and within me. Scott lowered himself onto me, his weight like a warm blanket on a cool night, comforting and decadent and all together right.

  I wrapped my arms around him and held on, enjoying every nuance of feeling. It was like climbing off a roller coaster, still giddy and breathless and terrified and thrilled all at once. Laughter bubbled up as my heartbeat returned to normal.

  Scott pushed up, looking down at me. He narrowed his eyes in a serious expression before pushing into me one last time, then broke into a smile and pulled out. He lay down on his back next to me.

  I turned to face him, drinking in the passion that shone in his dark eyes. I
smiled wider, feeling more than a little punch drunk. There was nothing like the feeling that came over me whenever he was lying in bed next to me.

  “Do you think someone saw us?” I giggled, the images flashing through my mind again in the naughtiest pictorial I’d ever seen.

  “I hope not. It seemed hot at the time, but I don’t like the idea of someone beating off to your picture.”

  “Picture?” I scooted back on the bed, then rolled to my side, propping my head on my hand.

  “Someone might have had a camera with a zoom lens.”

  “Wow, that is some imagination you have.”

  “I’m well paid to think of every possibility. It’s unlikely, but I’m not sure I’d want to risk it again.”

  “So you wouldn’t want me to return the favor tomorrow night?” I leaned over, kissing his neck, tasting the salt of the sweat from his effort of loving me.

  “Tomorrow night we’ll be on a plane, remember?”

  I rested my head on his chest, the scent of roses wafting up from the bed. Our body heat must have been releasing their perfume. “I hate red eye flights.”

  “You didn’t want to miss Janelle’s soccer game, remember? I thought we should stay the weekend.”

  “You should have been more persuasive.” I smoothed my hand down his arm, twining his fingers in mine. It still felt like we were one person, but I could feel my walls of protection going up again, as if they were made of heavy brick and mortar. Quickly, before they got too high, I whispered, “I’m scared.”

  “Of what?” His voice rumbled beneath my ear, his heart beating the rhythm I knew so well.

  “Of being here alone. I can do alone in New York. If we come here, it’s to be with you.” I closed my eyes, hating the ache in my throat, the wetness beneath my eyelids. It was a weakness I was loathe to show, even to him.